Why the pursuit of happiness might sabotage your relationship instead

A few days ago I told my husband something which left him baffled. I had this little hypothesis in my head that being with me has brought more pain rather than joy into his life and I wanted to check the validity of that thought. This was after I had gone through an emotional phase which I now attribute to hormones and stress, and that thought had emerged during an evening of reflection.

What was the story that brewed in my mind? Before we got together, he was a single man and could freely steer his life, career and dreams in whatever direction he wishes. Now that it is a shared life, there are more things for him to consider, sacrifices to make, expectations to manage, and a woman to handle. He had signed up for a package which also includes a monthly dose of emotional spells that show up like clockwork. Being the patient, thoughtful and solution-oriented person he is, he would take it upon himself to resolve the crisis that his woman seems to be going through, which is ironically being further expressed because of the safe space that he provides.

If you have ever been in a relationship, you would likely have gone through a similar experience and realised that this ‘suffering’ is part of the deal.

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